"What Fresh Hell Is This?"

I desperately need to find a new career. What the hell can a burned out 30 something offer a potential employer? What the hell am I even qualified for? Besides letting pubescent little boogers drive me insane, that is. Can I even do anything else gainful?
DH is in a royal snit, as well. He's supposed to be the stable adult at our house but he has left that up to me tonight and I think I'm going to disintegrate. Is 6:57 pm too early to put my kids to bed?

You may think I'm being facetious, but I assure you I am 100% serious.

ps.
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

Resume by Dorothy Parker

My New Idol

But I can't decide if it's Severus Snape or Mary Beth Ellis. Check out http://blondechampagne.blogspot.com, and http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9959467/ . Then let me know what y'all think.